Do we ever really move on from the past? Do we convince ourselves we have really moved on, when we wish it was the way it was before?
I wrote in the previous entry: There is no use regretting the past: what has happened, happened and nothing can be done to change that action. However, we don't always feel this way. Many times, we spend an enormous amount of time thinking about what has happened and how that could have been corrected. We might subconsciously scribble events in our planners that where once celebrated but no longer are.
What is the use? Why do we insist on doing this to ourselves, torturing ourselves, revisiting places, remembering people, reliving emotions that one particular period brought? It might have been an especially fulfilling time in one's life: having a glorious job, having a thriving social life, having one's family united. Now that this is no longer the case, the only option that we think we have is wallowing in sorrow because you no longer have this, either because of your own fault or you were unwillingly thrown out of the picture.
Remembering and reminiscing doesn't have to be painful. I think that when one can look back at a previous period and not feel the sting of remorse of no longer having it, then we can say we have moved on. Granted, it is not the same as looking back and regret having caused irreversible harm to someone else willingly or unwillingly: that is a completely different realm.
I'm not sure this is frighteningly similar to "Release". Oh well.
I don't believe we ever "move on" completely from anything. It will always be in the back of our minds as we make a decision or encounter any similar situation.
The most important thing to do is wrap your head around the idea that nothing can be done now. We need to work with whatever is in front of us. Whether it be something we didn't expect or a mess we have created; we can't hit "Undo."
What can be done is learning and putting that knowledge to good use. Living with the notion of wanting to change the past is outright ridiculous. And damaging.
We live in the present. Create something worthwhile now to dodge remorse later.
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Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. - A.E.
3 comments:
There can be no present without the past, nor can there be a future, for the present becomes the past.
I remember writing a paper for my English class this past semester on profanity. But this simple statement is all there is to know about living in the NOW.
"Fuck the past; make love to the future."
You just inspired me to post that short essay on my blog. lol ;)
I love that "Fuck the past; make love to the future" quote. And the beginning quote.
Short essay on your blog, you say? I must read. I just finished creating a study sheet for Philosophy. The actual studying will come sometime later. Lmao.
I think one of the reasons people look back on the past and wish they could go back to that time in their life is if they're going through a difficult time in the present, or if something just happens to be stressing them out, and they're like "Oh, I wish I could go back to this time...everything seemed so much easier and I was so much happier." One thing that happens, though, at least with me, is that I'll be thinking about all these good times I had and the positive memories, but at the same time, I had my fair share of stress and negative things that went along with them. I guess something we all need to keep in mind is that there are always going to be both negative and positive factors in our lives; even if we may not feel as happy now as we may have at that point, we're not there anymore. We're where we are now, and while that's not always the most appealing thing to have to accept, I think it's healthier to do our best to try to enjoy our life in the present as much as possible, rather than constantly focusing on past events and what could have happened and what used to be. Otherwise, our present life will pass us by and we'll be so caught up in wishing for past things that we won't get to enjoy what we have now.
Like you said, though, it's hard to move on. I know I'm someone who has trouble with letting things go (especially people), but I know that in some cases, there's nothing we can do. Even though it'll still hurt or be frustrating that we couldn't change or have done something different, it's better to concentrate on making the best of our lives as they come. Like you said, living in the past can be damaging, so it's better to make the most of our lives now so that they can be worthwhile. That way, even when we look back on good memories from the past, we can at least say "Well, I had some good times then, but I'm having good times now, too."
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